What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

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Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

How do you like to be pegged?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Make Nazis afraid again!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Why after 50 years of being straight do I constantly desire to suck cock?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Why don't we hear our own snoring?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Why do some women alter their faces by so-called cosmetic surgeries (on their eyes, cheeks, lips, chin, jaw) that making them look like Donald Duck or puffy aliens, while for most men these unnatural facial changes are ridiculous or even disgusting?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

NYC woman found a phone buried in her lawn — and police say it’s a new tactic thieves use to spy on homeowners - AOL.com

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

If our normal body temperature is 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit, why do we perceive weather in the 90s as "hot?"

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

When was you wife swapping fantasy started?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

What do you think is the #1 cause of why relationships nowadays don't seem to last long?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Record-breaking cosmic structure discovered in colossal galaxy cluster - Phys.org

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Why are there so many illegal Haitians in Ohio? They can't walk here. Democrats flew them here to cause chaos and crime in Ohio.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Which bands became massively popular for covering songs rather than recording originals?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …